"Is Cheating A Double Standard???"

So I was watching TV the other night & ran across a show that featured a group of men having a discussion on relationships, cheating & sex; which gave me the idea for this topic.

Coming from a woman's perspective I think we tend to look @ cheating vs casual sex in a much different light. Is there really a such thing as "no strings attached" when it comes to intimacy? From a woman's standpoint my answer is definit
ely NO...We'd all like to think of a one night stand as just that...however somehow in the midst of the simplicity I think it's in a woman's chemical makeup to "catch feelings" despite the circumstance...Where as a Man can keep it moving without becoming the least bit attached.

So I posed this question on twitter; "Do men separate sex from emotion?".

Here are a few of the responses I got...

TCJFResh said...
"depends on if its casual sex or sex with someone you already are emotionally attached to...casual sex is usually devoid of emotional connections BUT once a man falls in love, sex can become more emotional for him than her...yes women do have that tendency, men can avoid "catching" when its just sex."

urbanbarbiedoll said...
" Well I know you asked for the fellas to reply...but yeah I do think many men can have relations with a female n never look back...And you know this to be the truth!!! I am one emotional sassy muffin so I try too hard to act just like they do HEARTLESS! For sure! But you know how they be acting all layed back like whateva...killing me softly...my feelings be sooooo hurt(sad face)."

rawdawgbuffalo said...
"yep cause we often think with our stomachs and our dic*s in that order"

Bahama said...
"hell yea it's easy...9 times outta 10 they thinking with the "other" head anyway.."

pinkcufflyx said...
"yes. I think men physically cheat i/o emotionally. They r sexual creatures, not emotional."

zillz said...
"for most men i know its easy. i also know women who can do the same. it seems to be easier for us fellas, IMO, because... from boyhood, we're groomed to bed as many women as possible. that's hard to do if there's emotional attachment...for the most part we cheer each other on. Even strangers. Women, again in my IMO, for the most part, shit on each other take every chance to down one another. "Oh she's a ho." Biologically, women seem to need more to get in the mood. A dude is ready as soon as he knocks on your door... so taking all of that...its easier for us because it takes a lot less for us to do so, internally. perhaps women battle more."

I think the answer is pretty much unanimous that we as females do "catch feelings" whether we want to admit it or not. I've come across very few women who can honestly say that they've NEVER caught feelings after casual sex. But the questions that remain unanswered...

Is it selfish for a woman to draw emotion after a "one night stand" or two?

Is it fair to consider a man"HEARTLESS" or "COLD" if he doesn't become emotionally attached?

What are your thoughts???

By the way today is World Aids Day...Whatever it is that you do....please PROTECT
yourself & others by getting tested & knowing your status...More information HERE...


  1. Great post O! My friends and I always have this convo. Women try to do the casual sex thing but I truly don't believe it's possible. Feeling do get involved after awhile.

    They pretend to be "cool" with it but they'd been fell hard. And it rears it's ugly head as soon as they realize he's not feeling the same way. That's why people shouldn't have casual sex if they know they can't handle it. It causes too many problems.

  2. oooh Momma i made it!!!! lol and i don't know if i'd consider thing heartless or cold, having as much sex as they possible can is etched in the blood vessels of men, that's what they are suppose to do...so many of them think..it's like the norm for them. So i wouldn't consider then those things..Nasty dawgs though, that's another story...LOL

  3. lmao @ bammy...tell em how you really feel!!!